Yeah, we're going camping today. And even though we're camping at a site that is probably less than an hour away from my house, I have this overwhelming desire to put everything I own in my car. Why?

There might be bears.

You know it, I know it, we all know it. Bears are everywhere when you're camping. They can multiply instantly, and they have superpowers, such as being able to tell which one is my tent, aiming for it with their ferocious cuteness, then taking a swipe at my head and leaving me with one ear. If I have all of my crap with me, this will somehow stop them.

This is my first scenario. The second one involves explosive diarrhea and no toilet paper or hand soap. Ugh.

The final scenario, which I know is going to happen, no matter how many Off candles/sprays/etc. I bring, is the whole West Nile Virus scenario. I don't even know what that is, but if they gave it a real name instead of one that is chock full of scientific Latin terms, it means that if I get it, I'm screwed.

So, yes, I'll be the one out there with the bug spray and the sunblock, hiding from bears in my sanitary tent that is full of games and toilet paper. 

Nature is the best.