I love the box where Facebook asks what's on my mind. Rarely, if ever, does my status reflect what's going on in my brain. Usually, my thoughts run along the lines of, "What did we need to put on the grocery list? I know we ran out of something yesterday but I can't remember what it was, except I know it was really important" or, "Wow. Do I always look that fat in this shirt, or did I suddenly gain about 50 pounds?" and the ever-popular, "What show was that girl on? I remember seeing her on something. It was some kind of action show in the 80s, and I don't think it was Magnum, P.I."


Those are pretty much the same three thoughts I have, all day, every day.


Oh, I forgot:   When I'm learning a new piece, that also takes its turn running through the vast caverns inside my head. Don't you have vast, empty caverns inside your head? Yeah, that's what's in there. Sometimes I shout, "Hellooooooo," just to hear it echo back at me.


So every time I see that box on FB, I think, "Should I be having deep, life-changing thoughts that I could share with others in order to make the world a better place?" but then I can't come up with anything good, and I end up posting something about farts, puppies, and/or cheese. Then I feel like a really shallow person, unlike all my friends who post about their feelings. Then there are the people who post about their kids. I love those posts. I could read about other people's kids all day long (for once, this isn't sarcasm; I totally mean it). When I see pictures of some chubby-cheeked kid running around with messed up hair and paint on his shirt, for about 30 seconds, I forget about all the stupid crap in my brain and I think, "Aawwwwwwwwwwwwww. Look. Aaaaaawwwwwww."


Then it returns to normal in there. My neuroses take over and I'm back to being myself. I start worrying about whether or not I'm over-sharing when I write that if I was a cartoon character I'd be Charlie Brown, or if I posted a non-funny picture that I was being overly emotional.


So I hit delete, of course, but then I worry about whether the computer saves some of the stuff that I write and then delete, because if it did, that could be very embarrassing. Or maybe I didn't delete all of it, or deleted it improperly, so it's still floating around out there.


I forgot....am I supposed to be worrying less? I think I am. I think I made a New Year's Resolution (in capitals) to worry less and be more optimistic.


Maybe that should extend to Facebook. Maybe I should just post whatever pops into my mind and not worry about whether other people like it, because they can always unfriend me. Maybe I should just be like that all of the time, and I should say more when I'm around people and not be so shy, as I stand in the corner over-analyzing my every move. Maybe I should just be myself and be comfortable with that.


Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...like that's going to happen. Of course I'm going to continue making fun of everything in my brain and being a neurotic person. That's just how I roll. Facebook, you will never know what's going on in my mind, and you're just going to have to live with it. I'm content to let my random thoughts float about in the cavernous expanse inside my skull. 


Life is way more hilarious that way.