It has reached the point in the afternoon where I'm starting to feel like I'm going to die if I don't have some cake. There is no end in sight, and I haven't eaten anything in around three hours. I wonder what would happen if I went into the office down the hall and stole all of the candy they keep on their desk for customers. They might get mad, but I think I could take the old lady working the front desk, because I'm pretty strong and I think she has to walk with a cane.

I don't really want their candy, though. Their office smells funny and I would bet the candy has absorbed the strange smell so it'll taste like half candy and half musty vanilla air freshener.

I heard a rumor once that there was a snack machine in the next building, but that sort of kills the whole snack idea for me. I don't want to have to clock out, walk down all those stairs, go out into the cold, walk to their building, go up the stairs, get the snack, then go all the way back to my desk. That is way too much work for a lousy bag of Cheetos. Or is it? See? My mind's all muddled from hunger.

If this is the last thing I ever do, I'll be so embarrassed. I guess I'll have to survive to write another (much less crappy) post.

At least I didn't just spend the last two minutes reading some crazy lady's ramblings about being hungry. That, my friend, was you.