I felt like it was important for me to send a message out to all of the ladies out there. Well, men, too, I guess, but mostly to the ladies. That message is: We all have that moment.

What moment? Let me elaborate.

See, it's like this: You get home, after working all day, you talk to people periodically, whatever. Then, at some point, you have to go into the bathroom. Where there is good lighting and mirror action.

And then you see them.

Yep, I'm talking about hairs that are growing in places they oughtn't to grow. We all have different locations, but it's a common fight, man.

So stay strong.

Just keep telling yourself that no one noticed that large bushy growth springing from the area between your eyebrows. Or that mammoth mustache that popped up in less than four hours. Teenage boys would die for that superpower.

And what about those hairs under your chin, on your neck that aren't visible unless you turn your head, just so, and then the light catches it and it's like a 50-foot-long piece of spiderweb, floating carelessly on the breeze? Except not cool at all, because it's firmly attached to your neck.

So you take care of the problem, with industrial tweezers or a razor or some depilatory cream, maybe even with some wax if you've got some on hand.

But seriously. No one noticed.

And if your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/anyone else except a pet tries to come near the bathroom while you're taking care of that business, you tell them where they can go.

This is not a public spectacle, people. This is as private, if not more so, than the number two. Not a time for sharing.

So if a person gets a little crazy when disturbed during this special time, can you blame her? Of course not. Just stay as far away from the tweezers as you can, because those mofos are really sharp and you might lose an eye. So, yeah, probably go do something else for a few minutes. For the love of all that is good and decent, stay away. Let's act like this never happened. Let's pretend the person who is currently locked in the bathroom, standing with one foot on the sink and the other on the toilet in hopes of creating the perfect lighting situation AND getting proper leverage to get some containment going on this facial forest is really in there doing something pretty.

Like, maybe she's in there brushing her hair one hundred times. Let's go with that. Or maybe applying a fresh layer of natural-looking makeup. Yeah. 

She's for sure not doing anything in there that is smelly, involves bodily fluids, or is hairy. Not at all.

Let's go with that, okay?

So, all of you who fight this unwinnable battle, just know that we're all in there doing it. Well, most days. I mean, there's staying strong and there's throwing in the towel because there's a Holmes on Homes marathon waiting in the next room.

Come on. You know which way that's going to go.