So I typically get up an hour before I have to, so I can stay on a sleep schedule, but also so I can sit in the dark and drink coffee before having to interact with others.

I have noticed that, lately, it's taking more coffee.

I used to be good with just the one cup. Now, it's two, but I'm seriously dying for a third cup, and I generally make one and start in while I'm starting to work.

What's going to happen next? 

If I go up to three cups before I even start my day, the logical next step is four, and then maybe I will just need to brew an entire gallon and wear two cups on my head, maybe modifying one of those beer can hats to dispense hot liquids. I don't know.

That certainly seems more practical, but I will pretty much wet my pants every five seconds, and then I'll spend more time going to the bathroom than working, which is counter-productive, so what's the point of all the coffee?

See my dilemma?

I know for sure that my grandma pretty much just drank that stuff like there was no tomorrow, but she drank it without the cream and sugar. I just can't. I have to at least have some cream in it, or the heartburn will make me die, and that means more calories go towards coffee, and less go towards food, and I just don't know about that.

Ugh. The dilemma.

Maybe I should just sleep an extra half hour, and then I wouldn't be so tired, and then I wouldn't need the coffee.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Like that's an option. More coffee it is!