Hmmm...it's a lovely morning and I got all my other stuff done yesterday, so I have a couple of free hours before I have to start work. What to do? Oh, I know, I'll have a minor heart attack (along with my bird) when a sparrow flies straight into the front window and it basically makes a sound like someone threw a brick at the house.

Seriously. Our bird is sitting on the floor of his cage right now, shaking and refusing to be held or comforted.

Yes, we did buy all new windows for our house shortly after moving in. The old ones were fifty years old. Apparently, the shiny newness equals an invitation to come on in for all of the birds in town. Except they can't because GLASS.

The back windows get flown into regularly, but not the front ones as much because they have those little bar looking thingies in them...don't know what they're called, but I'm sure I could google it and find out in approximately two seconds if I felt like it, which I don't...who am I kidding, now I have to know...okay, they're called grilles. You would think the grilles would give the birds pause, but no.

And they fly right into them, lie on my sidewalk for half a minute, then fly away, but I know that they have to have massive brain damage after a collision that extreme.

So now my yard is full of brain-damaged birds and I feel guilty for having these big shiny windows.

And my bird is permanently scarred emotionally because he just heard a loud crash.

Moral of the story? There is none. Unless maybe it's that windows can, indeed be too clean for the birds' health and safety. No more cleaning those bad boys. I can live with that.