Some of my most brilliant ideas have come to me while I've been driving home from my weekly TV show watching with my sister. Maybe it's because it's usually dark and quiet, and I don't like anything they've been playing on the radio lately so I'm tending to just let it be radio-free, or maybe it's because the show we watch is so...well...lately, it's been less good, but it used to be quite a bit more interesting. Right now, there's too many good guys and not enough villains.

Yep, that's how I like my TV. Chock full o' villains.

Anyway, last night, I had a genius idea. So good, in fact, that I am going to run right out and get a patent before somebody else snaps one up and I lose the rights.

The idea? Creepy Karaoke.

So right before I turned off the radio, they played this weird song from the early 60s called, "Daddy's Home." (Shep and the Limeliters, I believe). That's the inspiration.

You can imagine the creepiness of this particular song, especially if you, like me, find it really weird that anyone would ever refer to his or her partner as "Daddy." Or "Mommy," for that matter. Or really any parental term. Because,  just, no. Gross.

So I thought, "Wow! I should sing this song next time I do karaoke...that would really creep everyone out!"

And my million-dollar idea was born.

There are so many songs that can be creepy in the right context. For instance, have an old lady doing karaoke? Find the creepiest match possible...I would suggest any Barry White song where he moans for the first couple of minutes, or perhaps "Son of a Preacher Man." Old guy? Perhaps with excessive ear hair? Try "Teenager in Love," or "Daddy's Little Girl." Or, as I mentioned above, "Daddy's Home."

There are just so many choices.

I am, for reals, going to try it out next time I do karaoke. I am just going to flip through that book of available songs and find the weirdest one and just go for it. The most beautiful part of this whole plan is that even those who feel awkward about doing karaoke, such as myself, can feel a little less awkward because people will just assume it's a bad song choice and won't be judging the actual singing.

So there you go.

Creepy Karaoke. Coming sometime in the future to a really gross bar near you. As a bonus, I'll include, "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus." It's always creepy. Every time.