The most frustrating part about the holidays, for me, is allowing myself to let go a little, but not too much. I have never been good at moderation, especially when it comes to my two nemeses: Work and Food.

Work seems as though it would be easier, as one can leave it behind at the office and go home. There's a slight problem with that, though, as I do half of my work from home, and my home is also part of what I work on. I can't go to bed if there's too much junk lying around, waiting to be picked up, and I have a hard time leaving dishes in the sink (although I have relaxed quite a bit on that one…I have a deep sink and I can pretend they're not there). I also have had trouble sleeping for the last week just because I'm going to be taking over some other people's duties while they're away and I worry that I'm going to forget to do all of that and screw everything up. Aaaand the Christmas singing stuff is about to go down and I'm still struggling with the new jaw tightness that makes everything a hundred times harder. Sigh.

Did I mention that I hate change? because, yeah, I do. I really, really do.

Anyway, when I get stressed out, I tend to relax with my diet a little bit, but that usually means I allow myself to eat candy as a meal replacement. It's got milk in it, right? That means it falls under the "dairy" category and is therefore healthy. Raisins? Got some fruit in there, too. I'm all set. If it has peanut butter, it's so freaking healthy I almost don't want to have it, but I guess I can suck it up and get my protein on.

Yeah, Reese's Pieces and Raisinets encompass three of the four food groups. What of it?

So, how to work a little harder to get stuff done, and how to relax my eating a little so I can have some treats but not gain weight? I just don't know. I always overdo. Here is a great example: Once, a long, long time ago, I had a cold. My voice teacher told me I should try to cough as little as possible, because I was getting ready for a performance and I wanted to be as kind to my cords as possible. So I didn't cough, even though I needed to. I ended up with pneumonia, because the fluid collected in there because I was bound and determined not to cough, so I didn't. At all.

Good job, me.

So I guess maybe if I focus on just being balanced and letting some things go a little, I will feel better about the whole thing. Maybe. Although, technically, that would be change and I am still pretty uncomfortable with anything that involves not being in my little happy place.

So, maybe a little more Reese's action and a little less work. A little. Like, maybe I won't go in on Christmas Day or New Year's Day this year. Maybe.

I'll do my best. To not do my best. Wait a minute…what? Because, really, the lesson I learned today is that I should cough and eat Reese's Pieces.

Mmmmm. Reese's Pieces. Okay, I'm happy now.