Hi, there. I wanted to let you know a few things. First off, your mullet is amazing. What with the length in back and the platinum color, you're giving Rod Stewart a run for his money, and I can appreciate that. It takes guts to pull off a haircut like that at any age, and in your late 70s, even more so. Bravo.
Secondly, I'm terribly sorry your husband has altitude sickness. So is everyone who was seated in our general vicinity that heard you telling anyone who would listen. Loudly. Way to go. It's always nice to get some attention for illnesses, be they yours or another person's. I hope he feels better, because I would bet that you're kind of a nagger, and he needs his strength. I'm sure you're quite the powerhouse, from the way you forcibly pulled people out of conversations with their friends and family to talk to them about your man's illness. So, yeah, sorry about that.
Finally, what made you decide to chew your gum the way you did through the entire second half? I mean, it was an hour or so. Didn't your jaw get tired? It's not that I don't enjoy my operas with an over-layer of chomping, but seriously. Seriously. I felt as though I was sitting next to a cow who was listening to an opera. See, I'm the kind of person that gets very distracted by little things that annoy me, and this, believe it or not, wasn't even a little thing. Believe me. At first, it was merely irritating, but as time went on, I was impressed with the strength and ferocity of your jaw. And the amount of spit. And the general, "I don't give a crap if I'm ruining your opera experience" attitude you seemed to convey.
Oh, and whispering to the guy next to you throughout the opera? Good choice. It didn't bug me at all. Not a bit.
So...thanks for enriching my evening. I hope you have a great week, lady.
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