Failure is inevitable. Of course. However, I seem to be making it some sort of an art form, and that is not my favorite.

Sigh.

Lately, I seem to be having a very low success rate with my endeavors. I'm not quite sure why, but it really sucks. I'm not really okay with defeat, and this is not just one or two times. It's everything. Kind of lame.

I had a rehearsal last night where I wanted to hide my head because I was embarrassed about sucking so bad. The hard part is that it's not from lack of work. If it was, it would be easier to take.

Everybody talks about how hard life is for the C students. I'm here to tell you, it's just as hard for some of the A students. Number one: Some of us have poopy social skills, due to extreme shyness and introversion, so that doesn't work too well. Number two: Some of us are too goal-oriented and we put way too much of our self-worth into the things we do, so when we fail, it's very personal. Number three: Knowing that you failed, not because you didn't put enough work or time into it, but because you're just not good enough, is not easy for anyone.

It sucks.

Ah, well. Try again tomorrow, I suppose. Or, I guess, today. I wish I could be more resilient and have a positive attitude, but I kind of fail at that, too.

Should've been a cheerleader. My number one skill is my ability to be perky, so, yeah. Oh, no, wait. That's not perky. Perky makes me puke. I forgot. At least I have my sarcasm to keep me warm.